Pride and Prejudice Blog 3

The only people to blame for the misconduct of Lydia are Mr. and Mrs. Bennet themselves. Nurture, or lack thereof is what leads Lydia astray from the strict moral and societal guidelines that defined her era. The dysfunctional environment that she has grown up in fostered her wild, unbridled spirit. This environment was encouraged by parents who had little control over their often rampant daughters. Maybe had the Bennets employed a governess, things would have been much different. The daughters “never had a governess...those who chose to be idle certainly might” (164). This disorder allowed Lydia to be free as a bird.
Mr. Bennet did not do much as far as the raising of the girls went. He is an apathetic figure who provides wit instead of boundaries. Elizabeth evens concedes that she was never “blind to the impropriety of his behavior as a husband” (231). Elizabeth, being one of his favorites receives more attention from him than the others do, but in most cases he is too bust being “fond of the country and books” (231). Had he been a more attentive father he may have been able to encourage better behavior of Lydia as well as provided her with a strong male role model. Mr. Bennet knows of Lydia’s behavior but he was “contented with laughing at them [and] would never exert himself to restrain the wild giddiness of his youngest daughters” (209). He is made of “a mixture of quick parts, sarcastic, humour, reserve, and caprice” (7), although these qualities endear him to Elizabeth who he himself describes as having ‘more of quickness than her sisters” (7), they do not make him a respected father to his other daughters. Instead of intervening in the haphazard disarray that is his household, Mr. Bennet chooses the easy path and just observes and adds his commentary.
Contrary to her husband’s reserved personality, Mrs. Bennet is unafraid to meddle in the girls’ lives as well as present her opinions and motives flat out to those who are around her. “The business of her life was to get her daughters married”(7), she will not rest until this task is completed to her satisfaction. This open focus on the importance of marriage pushes Lydia to make that her life’s priority as well. Mrs. Bennet encourages Lydia to flirt by not only bringing her out into society at an uncommonly young age, but also bringing her to Meryton with full knowledge of the officers stationed there. Lydia has begun to think highly of herself and wants to “be married before any of you [sisters]” (216). Mrs. Bennet’s condemnation of her other daughters’ lack of marital pursuit makes Lydia her favorite daughter, she refers to her being more “good humored” (6) than the others. This positive attention teaches Lydia that her actions are correct, and ultimately leads her down the path of ruin that she has already embarked on under the watchful eye of her mother. Lydia has developed an attitude towards the fact that her older sisters are not married saying that “Jane will be quite an old maid soon…how ashamed I should be of not being married before twenty three” (216). A girl Lydia’s age does not come to this attitude on her own, but under the guidance of a pushy, marriage focused mother. Had Mrs. Bennet sought to teach the girls values rather than that marriage is the only thing in life, Lydia would not have made it her sole purpose in life and therefore she would not have been so quick to elope.
One may argue that the parents are not at fault by saying that one cannot control girls of that age. However, in the society of that time, it was uncommon for girls like Lydia to be given as much freedom as she had, when Lady Catherine hears of her being in the public eye she finds it appalling. Some may say that the parents had no reason to distrust Lydia and therefore had no way of expecting that this would ever occur. The flaw in this argument is that they did. If Lydia’s personality was not clear throughout her actions and infatuation with the troops and with men in general, they Bennets certainly should have known once Elizabeth confronted them about it. Elizabeth describes her sister as having “a rage for admiration…[being] vain, ignorant, idle, and absolutely uncontrolled” (226), qualities which are not only unladylike, but damaging to the image of the family as a whole. Mr. Bennet however chose not to heed Elizabeth’s warning and ultimately allowed her to go to Brighton which leads to her elopement. His position of patriarchal authority would have allowed him to stop her from going, but he chose not to. The Bennet parents could have exerted innate parental control over Lydia and taught her better values, but their lack in both departments brings them to blame for her grave folly.